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Save the Great British Kip An announcement from the British Government in Exile Govex roundly condemns the proposed European Sleep Unit. The very idea that the ESU, representing a mere 7.5 hours of standard sleep should supercede the traditional 10 hours of the Great British Kip is ludicrous, costly and inefficient, and should be rejected at any cost. British children all over the world have never had any problems with the time-honoured system of: 12 Nods = 1 Zizz Now it is proposed by the crazed bureaucrats of Brussels, they will have to learn that: 1 Nod = .000266 ESUs Do we really want to condemn our children to mental torment and sleepless nights trying to memorise such drivel? And it is not only the kids who will suffer. The proposal for a compulsory minimum sleep allocation of 15 CentiESUs (whatever they are supposed to be) per working shift can only add confusion and yet another level of costly bureaucracy to our already immensely complicated and convoluted employment laws, driving yet more firms out of business. Furthermore it takes away the workers' hard won rights of taking a zizz or two, or even a quicknap whenever they can get away with it, thus leaving them dog tired and unable to turn up for their traditional tax free moonlighting jobs. The Great British Kip must be saved. Govex has initiated a series of wildcat halfkips in key sectors of the world's economies to make our point. If these do not lead to the proposals being withdrawn then we shall mobilise to the full for an immediate and indefinite mass sleep in. Good night. GOVEX is the Revolutions and Insurrections Division of Charles Forrington and Partners Limited Copyright 1999 Charles Forrington and Partners Limited
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