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An announcement from the British Government in Exile
Dancing Ken Hanks will once again fight Cheltenham at the coming General Election on theMonster Raving Loony Party ticket. "I know I would win easily if I went in as a Liberal or Conservative, but I want to win for a real party with real policies for real people.", says Ken, "I will appeal directly to the recently discovered lunacy gene which exists in all of us. In fact our founder and spiritual leader Screaming Lord Such anticipated this discovery many years ago when he first coined the party slogan 'Vote for Insanity. You know it makes Sense.'" This time round Ken has assembled a formidable campaign team, led by his agent Lee Sharpe, the doyen of the county's country music scene, and including the sinister Doctor Dervish, the Wizard of Spin. Doctor Dervish will be issuing a series of in-depth policy statements during the campaign designed to show that today's lunacy is tomorrow's reality. "Which party first proposed votes for eighteen year olds, the abolition of the 11 plus test, all-day pub opening and passports for pets?" he asks, "the Official Raving Loony Party. Which parties jeered and sneered at these ideas? The Conservative and Labour parties. Which parties finally adopted and implemented these policies? The Conservative and Labour parties! We know that our current policies will be adopted eventually, but why wait twenty, thirty or forty years for the old clapped-out juggernauts to wake up when we can do it today, or even yesterday." Party headquarters are in Cheltenham's legendary Cavern Club, where a continuous mass rally will be taking place throughout the campaign. "This time we will dance to victory," says Ken, "those that can't dance can roll, those that can't roll can tumble or crawl. If necessary we will use giant sweeping brushes to get them to the poll." 21 February 2001
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Dancing Ken to stand again